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Avatar Sues 2.0
05 September 2007 @ 04:01 pm
Seventeen more days. Still pretty bummed about the closure of Avatarsues' journal. I always loved to read it. It doesn't seem as if, by whatever miracle, she'll be returning. So it looks like you're stuck with me... or avatar_sues ... or atla_sues, though they haven't been updating. Anyway, on to today's sue.

Title: Analay, the Shadowbender
Author: Avatar Luna

Rating:

Full Name: Analay
Species: Human / Shadowbender / Psychic
Hair: Not mentioned.
Eyes: Not mentioned.
Unusual Markings: None mentioned.
Special Abilities: Can predict the future.
Special Possessions: None.

Origin: Gaoling, but she now works in the Fire Nation palace.
Connections to Canon: Azula's slave.
Analay has a vision and finds out the location of the Avatar's location. When asked what she saw by Azula, she lies and tells her that the Fire Nation will win the war. Pleased, Azula dismisses her. Analay goes outside and vents her anger. She yells about how much she hates Azula and how much she sympathizes with the Avatar since they are both alone in the world. She reminces about how she was considered the freak of the Fire Nation by many and how Shadowbenders were misunderstood. She decides to flee the Fire Nation and join the Avatar. She begins to pack he things but is called down to dinner. She sits with Ozai who asks her what she is thinking. She lies again by saying 'nothing'. That night, after everyone had gone to bed, Analay escapes the palace easily. Strangers give her food and she is led by an old man to a ship that will take her to Ba Sing Se.

Notes: I had been wondering where I had heard "Analay the Shadowbender" before. It wasn't until I saw the reviews did I remember the Nick Mag Original Character contest way back when. I'm not sure if it's the same Analay or not, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was. In any case, a pretty cookie cutter story if you ask me. There are already flashing signs that Analay will be paired with Aang.

Sample:
 
 
Current Mood: indescribableindescribable
The Sungi Horn's Tune: "All Good Thigs (Come to an End)" - Nelly Furtado
 
 
Avatar Sues 2.0
04 September 2007 @ 04:05 pm
Eighteen days until Book 3: Fire. I was excited to find that the Nicktoons network was replaying Season 2. Unfortunately it was like really, really late. Oh well. I'm happy that the search function is working for me again at FF.Net. That should make finding Sues slightly easier.

Title: A Cinderella Story
Author: Mysticdark1

Rating:

Full Name: Sakura Sohma / Saki
Species: Human
Hair: Brown
Eyes: Green
Unusual Markings: None mentioned.
Special Abilities: None mentioned
Special Possessions: A laptop.

Origin:
A kingdom. It was never really specified, but I think it's the Fire Nation
Connections to Canon: Zuko's online buddy for the past two years.
Sakura (Mysticdark1) and Zuko (BlueSpirit16) are chatting online about Sakura attending the exclusive Yatsubada High School and meeting for the first time. Sakura's stepmother then orders her to make her some coffee. Sakura logs out and goes downstairs. She, her stepmother and her stepsisters, Lulu and Cece, gather around the television for information on Prince Zuko and his rumored romance with Mai Apathi. Zuko denies ever being remotely interested in Mai and Cece and Lulu rejoice that Zuko is now available. Sakura utilizes this moment to tell her stepmother she's been accepted to the exclusive school. When her stepmother objects, saying she won't pay for it. Sakura replies by telling her she has a scholarship. Her stepmother still says she cannot go. A few days later, while talking to Zuko online again, Sakura tells him that she finally convinced her stepmother to let her go. The two talk about how nervous they were about meeting eachother and then about how much they hate their siblings. Sakura receives her schedule for her classes and learns she will be sharing a room with June Bounty and Katara Hakoda. She's told that she will have to work with the nurse since she is there on a scholarship. She asks the woman giving out the schedules if the campus has a Prince Zuko Club. The woman says 'no' and reminices about the Prince Azulon, Prince Iroh and Prince Ozai clubs that used to be at the school. As Sakura is leaving, she bumps into Zuko, who agrees that it was her fault and walks off to let her pick up everything she dropped. June begins to make fun of Sakura's gawking and pokes fun at her for wanting applications for a Prince Zuko Club. Sakura explains that the applications were for her stepsisters, who are now attending the school on tuition. Azula demands that Zuko give her his laptop so she can talk to the Teen Today magazine about an interview. Zuko tells her he needs it and she asks if he is "sexually connected" with it. Zuko then stalks off, past the screaming fangirls and to his dorm only to find Aang, a 12 year-old freshman, trying to get into his dorm. Zuko tells Aang to leave, since he has his own dorm. Sokka shows up and tells Aang that they are in the dorm next door with Jet. He and Zuko exchange insults and go their separate ways. Sakura and June arrive at their dorm and find Katara hanging a poster of Prince Zuko and Princess Azula on the wall next to her bed. June says that she and Sakura will get along just fine. Finding that BlueSpirit16 wasn't online yet, Sakura turns on the television and finds out that Prince Zuko has gone out with Mai Apathi and that Azula may have a boyfriend. Cece and Lulu burst into the room after an argument about how much of a jerk Zuko is. They demand they're Prince Zuko Club applications only to find out Sakura doesn't have them. They decide to start they're own club so that they can be the presidents. Sakura is then told she will have to work for her stepmother and maybe get payed for the job. Jun gets upset, after the twins leave, since the coffee shop she works at was sold, most likely to the stepmother. Sakura ignores her since BlueSpirit16. Jun then asks Katara if Sokka is rooming with Jet. Katara says yes, but reveals that she is seeing him.

Notes: This story plays out like every bad Cinderella movie I have seen. Of course it's based off that Hillary Duff flick, but I can see "Just Ella" in there as well, especially with the creepy fangirls. Also, what's with the awful last names? I can only hope Aang, Jet, Zuko and Azula's are never mentioned. I can imagine it now... "Aang Avatar", "Zuko and Azula Fire" and "Jet Freedom-Fighter". The online bits are especially awful. It's all in chatspeak. Ugh, chatspeak. Saki has to be one of the worst nicknames ever. It makes me want sake rather badly.

Sample:
 
 
Current Mood: lazylazy
The Sungi Horn's Tune: "The Way I Are" - Timbaland (ft. Keri Hilson and D.O.E.)
 
 
Avatar Sues 2.0
03 September 2007 @ 02:59 pm
Nineteen days left until Book 3. I had to give up my report on some "I'm the new Avatar!" fic since the Pit died on me. So I had to turn to Quizilla for today's Sue. I also took a little detour to the avatarsues journal, but still no triumphant return.

Title: The Blue Spirit's Assistant- 1, 2
Author: thefirewithinme

Rating:

Full Name: Jadin
Species: Human
Hair: Blonde.
Eyes: Golden.
Unusual Markings: None mentioned.
Special Abilities: Excessively annoying.
Special Possessions: A red oni mask, a journal and a sword.

Origin: Not mentioned, but is staying with the Blue Spirit in the basement of a Fire Nation palace.
Connections to Canon: The Blue Spirit's assistant.
Jadin is spying  on a group of Earth Kingdom generals, who are talking about moving troops to different fronts. Jadin falls through the rafters, finding that the generals had already left. She quickly runs to the basement and finds the Blue Spirit busy at work. She begins to fight with him about fixing it up because it's full of slime. The Blue Spirit retorts that he isn't going to be there for long and there is no point. After some time, Jadin removes her mask and asks that the Blue do the same thing, but he just ignores her. She gets angry and goes off to write in her journal, even though she's not allowed to have one. The Blue Spirit gives her a disapproving look through his mask. Jadin is restless when she is confined to her room. She annoys the working Blue Spirit by counting out her age (fourteen), showing that isn't a kid any longer. He tells her she can go and she almosts slaps him for saying he wouldn't be surprised if she was mental. Before she can, they hear loud noises above them. The Blue Spirit tells her to go check it out. She only wants to when he insists that she take her sword with her. As she leaves, she asks him why he is smirking at her (though he hasn't taken off his mask still). The story leaves off with Jadin being surprised at something.

Notes: Boring. That's all I can really say about this story. There isn't anything particularly special about this story, which is why I give it a "Bad" rating. All Jadin does is whine, complain and argue with the Blue Spirit. There doesn't even appear to be any real plot other than "How can I annoy the Blue Spirit today?". Jadin never really seems to want the job in the first place, which makes me wonder why she's working with him at all. I think my favorite thing about this story is the fact Jadin can detect the Blue Spirit's facial expressions behind his mask.

I have to say that the worse thing about this is the first chapter. It is accompanied by some cheesey love song by Nick Lachey. Foreshadowing much?

Sample:
 
 
 
Current Mood: busybusy
The Sungi Horn's Tune: "Le Disko" - Shiny Toy Guns
 
 
Avatar Sues 2.0
02 September 2007 @ 05:00 pm
20 more days until the Season 3 premiere. I'm really curious as to what type of stories will be coming. A good chunk of the Pit seems to be just Zutara stuff or "My version of Season Three! :D" these days. I can only wonder what kind of batshit is around the corner.

Title: Fire Lady Kiva
Author: Writer2TheEnd

Rating:

Full Name: Kiva, Galeia and Salem.
Species: Kiva: Human / Firebender
Galeia: Human / Firebender
Salem: Human / Firebender
Hair: Kiva: Not mentioned. Probably black.
Galeia: "raven-black"
Salem: "raven-black"
Eyes: Kiva: Not mentioned. Probably amber.
Galeia: "flashing amber"
Salem: "flashing amber"
Unusual Markings: Galeia and Salem are identical twins, even though they're brother and sister. "Flashing amber eyes" are pretty unusual too. Kiva has two long gashes on her right arm.
Special Abilities: Kiva has a magical singing voice.
Special Possessions: The real Zuko tied up somewhere. The Fire Nation, an elephant topiary, a bearded kitten named Zerra, "a prophecy and a young man's heart" and everyone's personality in a jar.

Origin: Fire Nation for the twins. Not mentioned for Kiva, but she's probably from the Fire Nation as well.
Connections to Canon: Kiva is Zuko's wife and Galeia and Salem are their groin-spawn.
Kiva and Zuko return from their honeymoon and settle into the Fire Nation palace. Kiva gets lost in the palace while looking for the rest room, after that, she searches for her room. When she finally finds it she begins to sketch with coal. Zuko comes in and asks how she is enjoying the palace. She complains that it's more confusing than city streets, causing him to burst into a fit of laughter. The next day, Zuko informs her that she has a conference with the press. Kiva does a quick change and the two head off to the conference. They are greeted by councilmen, paparazzi and, of course, fans. Kiva takes her time to reflect on how she's used to having fans who end up ripping her clothes off. During the interview that takes place, it's revealed that Kiva is a peasant who had some prophecy bestowed upon her. After the conference, Zuko informs her that Haru has been named Bumi's successor and will rule the "earth nation" someday. They then discuss the prospect of having children. Kiva tells him she's ready and they go to bed. The next morning, Kiva writes a letter to Katara only to receive one soon after from her. Katara's letter says she's getting married to Haru in Omashu in two weeks and she wants Kiva to be her maid of honor. Haru apparently would like Zuko to be his best man at the wedding as well. Zuko  is a little wary, considering that they are firebenders. Kiva finall convinces him and they decide to leave the next week.  Meanwhile Katara anxiously awaiting a letter from Kiva, whom she hasn't seen in eight and a half months. Haru delivers a letter to her. They  read it and learn that Kiva is pregnant and will be having a baby the next month. She also says that she's mad at Zuko for constantly guarding her and excluding her from peace meetings. Excited, Katara scolds Haru for wondering how news of their engagement spread to the Fire Nation. Back at the Fire Nation palace, Kiva is playing with her kitten, Zerra, when her water breaks. She sends the kitten to go fetch Zuko for her. When Zuko arrives she tells him she is giving birth. Katara is once again frustrated with Haru as he is trying to decide a present for the baby. They end buying both in the end. Sokka and Aang appear and they all climb on Appa and are off to the Fire Nation. Meanwhile, Kiva is pushing . After the first is out, the doctor goes to congratulate her, but Kiva continues to push, telling  him that there is another in there. Three minutes later, out pops the second baby.  Kiva decides to name the girl "Galeia" and Zuko names the boy "Salem". After four days on Appa, the GAang and Haru land on a newly built flying bison landing pad. The greet Kiva, who is resting in her chamber, and chat until a nurse comes in to inform Kiva that her babies won't stop crying, no matter what the nurses do. The babies are brought to her and she sings a Leanne Rimes song that was in "Quest for Camelot". The children soon fall asleep. Cut to when the children are five years old. When it is time for bed they request Kiva to sing their favorite song... "Burning Love" by Elvis Presley. When she concludes, the children and Zuko are estatic, that is until one of those pesky servants arrive. She informs them that Admiral Zhao wants an audience with them. Kiva tells Zuko that Zhao is her enemy. Zuko presses the matter until Kiva explains the situation to him. She says she used to be a thief and that Zhao caught her once and then tried to rape her. Zuko then resolves to kill Zhao. The twins had been overhearing this and call the fully grown Zerra  to help. They find Zhao about to hit a servant who was telling him that the royal family would not see him. The twins tell Zerra to attack. Zerra pounces and claws  and bites Zhao while dodging the fireballs  he's throwing. As Zhao was being arrested  for whatever reason, Galeia tells him to never visit them again. Zuko catches the two laughing about the matter and appears to be very cross about it. However, he exclaims how proud he is of them and gives them a hug. Kiva arrives and tells them that they are going to go and visit the GAang and Haru since it had been five years since they had seen them last. Katara decides not to leave the children with Iroh this time. Zuko is waiting for Kiva so he could start his peace meeting. When Kiva arrives, it isn't a peace meeting, but a "family reunion" with Sokka, Suki, Katara, Haru and Aang. Galeia tackles Sokka for calling her a munchkin and soon everyone is in a dog pile with Kiva on the bottom. In ordr to get everyone off of her, she sings a high pitched note. That night, the kids find their way into Zuko and Kiva's room. They had accidently burned a hole in their beds. Zuko and Kiva decide that it is time for them to start their training as firebenders. The twins are then put to bed again. Salem returns and asks why peace between the nations are so important. Kiva explains how they're all interconnected. She puts him back to bed and returns to her own again. Years later the twins are old enough to court. Salem is (supposed to be) dating a girl named Roxanne while Galeia chooses a boy named Fang. While he's cooking a souflé in the kitchen, Galeia starts an argument about Salem not caring about the future of the Fire Nation and making bad choices. Salem tells her that Fang is a bad choice. Their arguing ruins the soufflé and Salem tells Galeia to get out. She runs away crying.

Notes: Oy vey. I think I have a headache. Is the fandom collectively agreed "Fire Lady" is the title of the Fire Lord's wife? It just sounds kind of lame to me. I think everyone in that fanfic was OOC. But my favorite part is Kiva's insta-pregnancy. Good La! They were talking about having kids at the end of Chapter one and by the beginning of Chapter two she's eight and a half months a long.

The fact that this is a rewrite makes me wonder how terrible the first draft was. I can only guess that she was practically the same only with an evil twin judging by the hints throughout. They only thing that saved this from my worst rating is that the grammar and spelling is good.

Sample:
 
 
Current Mood: draineddrained
The Sungi Horn's Tune: "Big Girls Don't Cry" - Fergie
 
 
Avatar Sues 2.0
01 September 2007 @ 04:55 pm

Hey there everyone. As you may have guessed, I am mutant_sues. This is my first crack at sporking and I do hope it gets better with time. So enjoy my first entry into what I hope will last for a very long time.


Title: Fire Princess Zukya

Author: Gothic Arcitc snow Wolf

Rating:


Full Name: Princess Zukya

Species: Human / Firebender / Blessed Dragon Child
Hair:
"black hair in a high ponytail"

Eyes:
Hazel

Unusual Markings:
A lightning bolt shaped scar on her forehead and right cheek. A “flame scar” on her left cheek. A birthmark in the shape of a Chinese dragon on her left hand.

Special Abilities:
Is a master firebender with abilities to shoot lightning and blue, white and “dark” flames. Zukya also can apparently control lava. She is also a master in hand-to-hand combat and weapons. Can go into the “Dragon State” where she is powered up and presumably uncontrollable.

Special Possessions: A sister named Zukiea and a brother named Kuzo. Ruby earings and a dragon medallion. A hawk named Storm, a fire wolf named Lightning, and a “red fire dragon” named Comet. Armor, training outfits and a mask that looks like the Blue Spirit's... only it's red. A ship and crew. A mental connection with Zuko. A silly uncle that travels with her.

Origin:
The East Fire Nation Kingdom AKA the good Fire Nation.

Connections to Canon: Though he doesn't know it yet, Zuko's betrothed.

Iroh carries Zuko from Ba Sing Se after he decides Azula is wrong. He was consequently shot in the shoulder with lightning while protecting Iroh from Azula's wrath. Iroh tends to Zuko in an abandoned building as Zuko angsts about betraying him. He eventually falls asleep. Meanwhile, in the East Fire Nation palace, the emperor sends his sixteen year-old daughter on a mission with her uncle, Yen Shi to retrieve the “heroes” of the East, Iroh and Zuko. He also explains that even if her brother completes his mission to gain back his honor, he would never get the East Fire Nation throne. She accepts the mission and goes to pack. Her sister Zukiea enters and asks to come along but Zukya tells her off, causing the little girl to run away crying. The “High General” Feng Shu insists on going with the princess, but her uncle appears and and declines for her. Zukya is greeted on her ship by the crew. She gives out their orders and dismisses them all. Zuko reminisces about when he got his scar and how he almost died when it got infected. Zukya begins to flashback about after going into the “Dragon State” and nearly dying. They both share a parallel experience in the flashback about someone singing the “Four Seasons, Four Loves” song to them and not feeling alone. When Zuko awakes, Iroh explains to him about the Eastern Fire Nation and they make a plan to go there when Zuko is healed. Zukya illustrates her power to her uncle, who tells her not to work so hard. She then excuses herself to go meditate. She has a vision where her brother is taunting her by calling her a failure. Her uncle splashes water on her and tells her that they have located Zuko. On her brother's ship, Prince Kuzo is informed of his sister's whereabouts and decides to go find her. Zukya arrives on her dragon at the abandoned house where Zuko and Iroh are hiding. As introductions are made “Zoku” shows up and attacks the group. “Zoku” tells Zukya he's better than her and that once her sister grows up, her father won't love her anymore. He retreats with his men for no real reason, leaving Zukya crying on the ground. Iroh and Zuko comfort her. She spends the night since it is getting late. At night, she and Zuko cuddle and fall asleep together.

Notes: First spork and man was it terrible. It's like someone smashed Azula and Zuko together and got this mess. The overall story was very confusing. Originally Kuzo was the uncle. Then Kuzo was the brother and then he changed into Zoku. I'll give you three guesses where Zoku/Kuzo's name comes from. I don't think I even need to mention the “Dragon State” or the East Fire Nation Kingdom.


The only thing that kept this “story” from the worst rating was the fact that most of the spelling was okay and that the grammar wasn't completely awful and could be fixed.

Sample:



 
 
Current Mood: amusedamused
The Sungi Horn's Tune: "Mad World" - Gary Jules